I Miss My FRIEND

Back in 1999 I was the Casting Assistant on a TV show called Strip Poker. It was a game show for USA Network that was as sleazy as the title implies. My job basically was to recruit twenty-somethings to appear on a show that required them to disrobe every time they lost a hand. Just like the real Strip Poker that we all played in college, except without the booze.

In a nutshell as the Casting Assistant, I called people in and quizzed them on poker skills. Then I would ask them to strip provocatively, (in a freezing sound stage,) to see if they had the right "charisma" to appear on the show. (It was a nightmare.)

The show, I might add paid $1,000.00 TOPS. We're talking LOW-BUDGET. Desperate Actress Central!

Since there is no nudity allowed on USA Network, our wardrobe stylist would have to come up with elaborate slutty outfits for the ladies. She'd have to provide enough layers to guarantee our contestants wouldn't show anything obscene, yet still look "sexy and provocative" for the show to succeed. She hated her job.

(Wouldn't you?)

She went on to design handbags that doubled as dog carriers and made a fortune. (Typical L.A.)

The show lasted two seasons before it was canned. Anyway, getting to my point.

One day I was grazing the craft service table, cursing the fact that there was only one bagel left. And it was POPPY SEED. Uuuuugggggggghhhhhhh. In walks the cutest guy I'd seen in a long time. He was in and out in a matter of seconds.

Later in the day, as I'm fully immersed in work my friend Claudia comes up to me and says, "Sam! This is Thor, he's replacing me. I'm moving on to another show." He was dreamy. He was the same guy I saw briefly at the craft service table! Here was my chance!

What did I say you ask????

"Thor??? Your name is Thor!! LIKE, that's so rad. LIKE, the GOD OF THUNDER??? Right on!" As if he hadn't heard that before. Good job Valley Girl. (sigh.) I was twenty-four with a college education and yet somehow ridiculously reverted back to 8th grade conversation.

He said, "Yeah, my name is Thor." (You idiot. What's the matter with you?)

I was SMITTEN. Had a crush on him for the next three days. I was convinced I'd win him over, even after my stupid god-of-thunder comment. I turned on the charm, put on the moves and wore my cutest outfits. Then I found out he was gay.

I remember thinking to myself, "WHAT??? SERIOUSLY??? NO WAY!!!!!!"

THEN, it was obvious. THEN, we started to get to know each other. Then, we became close. I don't know why I didn't catch the gay-vibe right away and really, who cares.

Thor became the friend I needed. He was enough removed from my former life to have perspective, yet involved enough to know the truth. I know that sounds vague to those of you who are new readers but he'll understand.

New Year's Eve of 1999/2000 I went to a party with Thor and Jarin as my dates. I felt like the luckiest girl in the world; with not one, but TWO dates to a New Year's party. Yes they were gay, and it was pretty much guaranteed I wasn't going to be getting any action that night, but I was thrilled to have two hot guys by my side to ring in the millennium.

Thor, Jarin and I made a resolution to meet "the one" in the year 2000. Wouldn't you know it? Thor and I both met our partners in February.

Five years later Thor would be a groomsman in my wedding. (We debated whether he should be a bridesmaid or groomsman because TECHNICALLY he's on my side, but we both decided he'd be more comfortable in a suit than a strapless dress.)

Eight years later, despite him living in London, despite us only being able to talk occasionally, despite he and I being in completely different living situations, we're still close. We're still the same two people that hit it off immediately.

We talked last week for a while and it was a wake up call. I miss my friend. I'm sad he's in the UK and not here. When I was fired from my job he was the one to buy me too many apple martinis at the Cobalt Cafe. When I had no date for New Year's he stepped up. When I needed to be slapped into reality, he was there to guide me. I miss him. I miss working with him. I miss having a drink with him.

My mom misses him too. (My mom adopted Thor as her own years ago, so, I guess that might make us brother and sister by now.)

I miss my friend. But I'm glad the geographical distance hasn't changed who we are together.

I miss you, my friend.