Daydreaming

Work has been pretty slow lately. Summer usually is but this is getting silly. We have one big job in house right now and the shoot requires a virtual menagerie. Something like 100 different animals on the set over the course of 6 days. I was telling a friend that I just got an invoice for the woodpecker's "handler" citing his fee and list of demands. A "woodpecker rider" if you will. I joked to my friend that the first image I had after reading over the invoice was that of the woodpecker, sitting in his star trailer smoking a cigar and groping the make-up girl; all the while squawking "where the hell's my lunch???"

Meanwhile all I can think about is being here:


That was taken from our condo balcony in Maui. Absolute heaven.

Or here:




I would even settle for being here because at least it was still in Maui:


(Even though the hillbilly couple in front of us kept INTENTIONALLY driving through piles of cow dung just to watch it splatter.) That's the thing about Hawaii though, even when covered in sh*t it's still a good time!

Tequila and Popsicles

I went out last Saturday night with "the girls" to a goth-inspired Mexican restaurant for dinner and what turned out to be WAY TOO MANY margaritas. We had to wait a while before being seated so we filled our empty stomachs with booze hoping to quiet the growling. By the time we sat down for dinner we all were stumbling, ravenous, and LITERALLY didn't speak for a good 5 minutes after the food arrived. I had the Caesar salad with steak. Yes, this is an important detail to the story so just keep reading.

When we finished eating one of the girls and I went outside for a cigarette to the packed patio of twenty-somethings waiting for tables at the bar. I guess eating at 9pm like we did is considered the early bird special on a Saturday night, seeing as most of the restaurant’s patrons were eating closer to 11. As we stood out there smoking, purveying the crowd, I noticed a girl wearing a great little corset-like top and matching skirt. I leaned into my friend and said, "look how cute she looks, I love her outfit!" My friend nodded, looked her up and down and kept on smoking. But, just at that moment the girl turned to look over at us and quickly turned away, realizing the two of us were essentially staring at her. Not in a creepy way, but definitely looking. She moved in closer to her friends, (probably for protection,) and I leaned over to her and said exactly what I said to my friend, "hey, I love your outfit, you look great!"

And she says, "ARE YOU MOCKING ME???"

Now, this girl had to have been a good 10 years younger than me, and seemed relatively new to the whole "bar scene.” In fact, she was probably just out of college. Yet, I couldn't help but wonder what happened in her past to have her automatically assume I was MOCKING her by complimenting her choice of clothing?!?! Was she teased by the girls on the playground in grammar school? Did the cheerleading squad spread rumors about her in High School that scarred her for life? Did the sorority girls give her the silent treatment?

Or, are we ladies so inherently competitive with one another that we automatically assume a fellow woman's random compliment most likely is a jab? After assuring her I wasn’t being snide, I went back to our table and felt happy for once to be in my 30s, because that insecure thought would never cross my mind now. Well, unless I saw a couple girls pointing and laughing… I mean, I’m not an idiot! =)

The next morning I woke up and pounded a glass of water. I thought I was thirsty because of the 4 margaritas I drank. Lo and behold, it was not the tequila, but a raging case of food poisoning. I spent most of the day Sunday puking my guts out in between trying to keep chips of ice and licks of popsicle down. Not exactly how I planned on spending the day.

By 4:00 PM the next day my stomach muscles were STILL sore from all the heaving. I was WAY over my “happy to be a strong 30-something woman with relatively good self-esteem” and busy cursing my stupid 30 something body knowing full well in my twenties I would have bounced right back.

And that my friends is the beauty of being a woman- the right to change your mind whenever it suits your mood. =)