The Accidental Foodie

Saturday night Hubbie and I had tickets to see Dana Gould at the Imvprov. When I bought the tickets, the website suggested we arrive an hour and a half early to eat in their dining room and we'd get preferred seating. Since I love Dana Gould and have never been to the Improv, I told Hubbie that would be our plan. In fact, I actually said to him, "I mean, how bad could the food be? It's the Hollywood Improv!"

Bet you know where this post is going.

We arrived an hour and a half early, to be seated in an empty dining room. Apparently we were the only suckers that fell for the "dine with us" line. We each ordered a drink and opened the menu. Two whole pages of deep fried food. Fried calamari, fried chicken strips, fried buffalo wings, french fries, fried chicken sandwich, fried mozzarella sticks and fried Caesar salad. Ok I made the last one up but I swear the only items not deep fried on the menu were the double burger and two pasta dishes.

While we looked at the menu and looked at each other, an order came out and was served to a few people at the bar. It looked and smelled like cafeteria food. And not the good Clifton's kind, I mean the gross Hometown Buffet kind.

It was then I decided to make a break for it. I told Hubbie to suck down his drink and we'd eat across the street. From my chair I could see a restaurant with twinkle lights and open tables by the open windows. It was called Chocolat, and I wanted to go. Hubbie was reluctant. Nevertheless, he paid the tab for our drinks and after some mild attitude by the waiter, we excused ourselves and said we'd be back for the show.

Across the street we walk into Chocolat, which was virtually empty. I'd say four of the fifteen tables were filled and two of the empties were set for a large crowd. I look at Hubbie and wink, "hey, we're in luck! It's empty! See! It was a good idea to leave!"

"Table for two please" I say with a smile.

Two beady eyes glare back at me. "Do you have a reservation?"

"Er, no. Do we need one???"

"Sorry ma'am, we are all booked up for the night" says the host, looking out at the sea of open tables.

"I'm sorry? But you have nothing available? We'll eat fast! We have a show to catch across the street. We'll sit anywhere!" Now I'm sounding a little frantic.

He still denied us! What a jerk! I felt like I was in a Seinfeld episode. What did we do wrong? Did we snub him by just wandering in off the street? Were we not dressed properly? Did we look like dine n' ditchers??? This is Los Angeles for god's sake. The city where people go to Crustacean in sweats!

Beginning to doubt my decision to leave the deep fried palace, I convince Hubbie that if we just walk down Melrose, we're sure to bump into something. After all, Ago is just a few blocks down and so is Dolce. Immediately Hubbie refuses Dolce and says something about not wanting to put one more dollar in Ashton Kutcher's pocket. That, and the fact that the restaurant is filled with wannabes and drunk girls with fake boobs. It kinda puts you off your food.

So we keep walking. And walking, and walking. Hey, who's that guy walking toward us picking food out of his teeth? Oh my god! It's Dana Gould! Where did he eat? Why is he alone? Think he could get us into Chocolat???

Two blocks ahead we stumble into a brightly lit modern space with Japanese anime projected on screens above the sushi bar. It's called Kumo, and we were told it had just opened the night before. Which, as we all know, could spell catastrophe.

In this instance it turned out to be great. Hot and cold dishes, full bar, signature drinks, beautiful leather chairs and friendly service. Since it was our first visit and the waitress was still unfamiliar with the entire menu, we just went with our gut. (Ha ha. Get it? Two points for the corny pun.)

The waitress explained the dishes on the menu were only two or three bites big; somewhat like Spanish tapas. She also said they come out fast, so order a couple at a time and eat til you're full. I was so upset I was caught without my camera. Hubbie was thrilled. He gets really embarrassed when I take pictures of food.

We started with yellowtail sashimi, spicy tuna stuffed jalapenos and ahi tuna w/ fried sweet potato. Then we ordered some warm dishes. Baked miso cod, seared scallops and truffle mashed potatoes. Mmmmmmmm. So much better than mozzarella sticks. I washed my meal down with a Grey Goose martini served perfectly cold and salty. We probably could have stopped there but went ahead and ordered a crab and lobster roll, which at $24.00 was a bit of a splurge but oh, so tasty!

With tip and my drink our tab came to about $150.00. Not exactly a bargain. But with fantastic service, ambiance and food in that location, not too bad. I imagine once the word spreads we won't be able to just walk in on a Saturday night. Especially since I just found out it's owned by Mike Ovitz, of CAA fame.

With our bellies full of fish we had a great time watching Dana Gould. Here's a clip of him if you want a giggle.